This time of year, self-reflection is just as common as holiday parties and presents under the Christmas tree. We reflect on all the epic things we achieved this year…and all the things we still haven’t. And we feel suuuuper motivated to be our best selves again (you know, the one who actually packs her own work lunches and makes time to meditate each morning) and excited to set AMMMAZING goals for the coming year.
And yet, somewhere from January to December, a lot of those epic goals get lost, forgotten or pushed to the verrrry bottom of our to-do list. Year after year.
But here’s my challenge to you: make 2019 a different kind of year. The year where you become the goal-slayin’, self-lovin’, confident-talkin’, dream-livin’ badass you’ve always wanted to be. But to get there…you need to do something RADICALLY different.
You need to hire a life coach.
And before I get into specifics about how EVERYTHING will change in your life when you hire one…I’m gonna tell you my story of working with a life coach.
My Journey of Using a Life Coach
Let me set the stage for ya’: I was a student at Columbia University, where I was getting my Masters in Social Work. And at the time, I was really, really passionate about social enterprise. (Basically, a fancy term for helping create sustainable business models to serve poor communities all ‘round the world). And I always knew that I wanted to work on those kind of projects in developing nations.
The problem? I was feeling uuuuber frustrated. I knew I was smart, but I wasn’t getting the right jobs opportunities. And I was trying soooooo hard to “make it” in my dream field and smile through every single rejection or obstacle thrown my way, I felt freakin’ exhausted.
That’s when I started to seriously think about getting a life coach. I’d heard a little about life coaches before, but didn’t know a lot about what they really did or how they helped people. Plus, I knew they were a big investment, money-wise.
But I also knew that MYSELF and MY DREAMS were worth investing in, too, and that I was sick of feeling stuck and like I’d never be enough to get where I wanted to go in life. And I didn’t want to spend years trying to feel better, either – I needed a solution, fast.
So I got a life coach. Natasha. And it was the single most life-changing decision I ever made.
Why? Well, there are three simple but MEGA HUGE reasons:
- Natasha was a suuuuper confident badass who saw what she wanted, went after it, and conquered. And she taught me how to do the same thang!
- She helped me realize alllll the ways I was getting in my own way – like with my limiting beliefs and desperate energy and unbalanced lifestyle – and how these things were holding me back from reaching my professional goals. Plus, Natasha helped me create goals that tapped into some hella deeeep wells of motivation I didn’t even know were inside me!
- While Natasha was always crazy compassionate, she also pushed the HELL outta me. When I’d say, “I can’t be an entrepreneur on my own! Are you crazy?!?”, she’d come right back with, “I know you have all the skills you need.” And she’d push and handhold me through alllll the things I’d tricked myself into believing I could never handle or wasn’t good enough for…until I did and slowly learned how to do those things on my own.
Lo and behold, after a six months of weekly dates with Natasha, I got a fellowship to go be an entrepreneur in India and make my dreams a reality. But that was just a small part of how she changed my life. Natasha taught me how to love myself and go after my goals with grace and grit. Plus, she taught me how to keep my motivation flowin’, no matter how tough life gets. Basically…Natasha helped me tap into the inner fire and fuel I needed to get where I am today!
Why Using a Life Coach Is the Key to Achieving Your Goals in Life
Now, I know a lot of the time, we wanna do EVERYTHING on our own. Instead of hiring a personal trainer, we find workouts on Pinterest to do at the gym. Instead of going to a hairstylist, we decide one pair of scissors, several YouTube tutorials, and a few good mirrors will do. But when it comes to systematically transforming your whole life, how-to or self-help books aren’t comprehensive enough to give you alllllll the guidance you need.
Plus, there is something sooooo freakin’ special about having that one person in your life. That one life coach who believes in you and can see the bigger picture and who will always remind you to stay true to what your heart really wants out of life.
And that’s exactly what I want to be…for you!
So if you’re reflecting on 2018 and feeling anxious or burned out or tired about not making enough progress, and you’re ready to step into a fundamentally new version of yourself in the new year…I’m ready to help. And I can guarantee results.
Why? Well, I’m glad you asked. ‘Cause here are seven reasons – from keeping you accountable to helping you create lifelong healthy habits – working with me as your life coach will make sure you slay allllll your goals in 2019:
1. I’ve walked your path…and made it through the same shit you’re going through!
No matter why or where you’re feeling stuck, I can guarantee I’ve been there, done that in some form or fashion. I’ve battled and overcome anxiety and depression. I’ve experienced sexual assault. I’ve moved to India, Argentina and a bunnnch of other countries all on my own. I know what rock bottom feels like, whether it’s hating your body or feeling stuck in an abusive relationship or being cheated on by someone you thought was the love of your life. And I’ve tooootally been that person who has nooooo idea where they should go next in life, or is always procrastinating on their goals.
Plus, I’ve worked with hundreds of kind-hearted go-getters just like you, who want a heck of a LOT outta life…but struggle with confidence, balance and putting themselves first. And out of ALL the people I’ve worked with, I’ve never met someone who is “beyond help” or who couldn’t get past what they’re going through to achieve their awesome dreams.
Because of that, I ALWAYS walk into our sessions knowing that you will succeed. It’s just a matter of helping you realize what a freakin’ BADASS you really are and creating the mindset and crystal clear roadmap that will guide you to your dreams! And just like I learned with Natasha, it is radically transformative to have someone who believes in you ALL THE TIME, especially in our uber critical society. So with me as a constant source of unconditional love and support, I know you’ll smash whatever goals you wanna conquer.
2. I will help you set concrete goals and learn how to measure your own progress in a suuuuper motivating way!
Have you ever set a goal like “I wanna find a better job” or “I wanna be more confident”…only to realize that you have NO idea what achieving those goals would look like or how you can tell if you’re actually making progress?
Well, when you work with me, you NEVER have either of those problems. Why? I teach all of my clients how to approach goals like business owners.
First, that means you set concrete targets, just like businesses aim for a certain amount of turnover or profits for each season. You ask yourself, “OK, if I wanna find a life partner, what does that really look like? How would I behave? What would I feel? What would I think? Who would I hang out with? What could this goal really look like in six months?”
And then we work backwards and figure out, “OK, that means next week, I need to be doing X activity for Y amount of times.” For example, if you’re lookin’ for the love of your life, maybe you go to two different social networking meetups a week to help you feel less anxious about talking to and connecting with strangers.
Then comes the second part of achieving your goals with a business mindset: quantifiably measuring how well you’re doing. For instance, maybe your goal is to be able to walk into a party and confidently talk to strangers. We’ll set up a system to quantifiably measure your ability to do this, and give you concrete tools to improve this measure every week.
Setting suuuuper clear goals and ways to measure your progress means that you can actually SEE yourself moving forward, even if you don’t feel like you are. And that kind of visible “proof” keeps you motivated for any and all of the hard work ahead.
3. I keep you accountable…and that means you WILL make progress!
When you want to GUARANTEE progress, you need an accountability system. But most people base their accountability systems on fear, which in the big picture, only contributes to more anxiety and feelings of “not being good enough.” My approach to accountability is radical and grounding.
Here’s what I mean: I once had a client who I’ll call Sara. She was trying to learn how to set better boundaries with people, and her “homework” was to tell someone an uncomfortable truth every day for a week, and text me about how it went.
How did we hold her accountable to doing these scary tasks every day? Well, we agreed that if Sara didn’t do it one day, then during our next session, we’d meet on her front lawn and use a megaphone to scream at allllll of her neighbors to stop having loud parties and clean up their own shit and stop honking all the time. In other words, she’d have to experience an even more extreme example of what it means to take up space and speak her truth.
Using accountability strategies like that one helps motivate you to follow through on your promises, even if you feel stuck in fear or laziness or procrastination. But it also keeps accountability from just becoming a form of punishment. Standing on her front lawn with a megaphone would still help Sara grow and make progress toward her goal. And I think this method is a whoooole lot more of a loving and compassionate way to create accountability than just saying, “If you don’t do this, you’re gonna be a failure or you’re gonna have to donate $50 to charity” or whatever other “punishment” I could give.
4. I create experiences with my clients that transform them waaaay more than just sitting in an office and talking ever could.
When you hear the words “therapy,” what image comes to mind? Walking into some stiff office, laying back in a chair and talking about your problems?
That’s what makes life coaching and therapy SUPER different! Because, sure, sometimes I do have sessions with clients where we sit down and talk about what’s going on in their life and brainstorm solutions. But a LOT of my sessions actually take place in the “real world” while you practice skill-building and facing your fears.
For example, when you work with me, you might…
…call me on the phone so I can meditate with you for 10 minutes every single morning, until meditation becomes part of your routine and you don’t need that phone call anymore!
…take me to your favorite bar so you can face your fear of talking to girls head-on, and so I can help you think through, “OK, why am I scared? What’s coming up in my thoughts? What worst-case scenario is playing in my mind?” And then you go and talk to that girl, using the communication skills we’ve worked on…and when you come back to our bar table, we process what happened, and celebrate your progress together.
…ride the subway with me next to you so that you can practice staying “present” in your body, practicing compassion, and releasing the anxiety that small spaces give you.
You get the picture! Basically, I really take on whatever my clients need to cultivate or overcome because that extra support can help push them through the procrastination or laziness or fear that’s getting in their way.
5. We focus on developing habits and strategies, not “quick fixes.”
You can open up any self-help book or any health magazine and find “quick fixes” that will supposedly double your motivation, help you drop 20 pounds or just make your life a million times more awesome. But when you work with me, you don’t just come in each week, tell me what’s not going so great in your life and get advice on how to “fix” it. We actually work on developing habits and routines that will set you up for success for the WHOOOOLE rest of your life.
For example, I teach you how to:
- Breathe correctly (And not just breathing like you do every second you’re alive. I mean the deeeeeep, rhythmic breathing that will give you energy and help you feel relaxed, no matter what!)
- Meditate and practice mindfulness
- Make food that’s right for your body
- Make decisions in a mindful, logical way that’s also really aligned with your inner needs and desires!)
- Respond to difficult situations with self-love and compassion
- Communicate effectively to get what you desire
The list goes on and on! But notice – every single one of these habits are things that you will use daily to support your life and your goals. And by guiding you through these habits over and over, I’ll make these actions feel as natural and seamless as brushing your teeth or taking your morning commute to work. So instead of having this long to-do list you have to think about checking off every day, all these habits will become subconscious and automatic…which is ideal for long-term change!
6. I make sure your goals and allll the tools I teach you align with YOUR unique purpose in life.
Think back to a goal you set in the last few years but never made ANY progress on. Did your goal include the word “should”?
Clients come to me ALL THE TIME saying things like, “I should be more hard-working,” or “I should do more yoga” or “I should want to get married”- well, you get the picture.
The problem with “should” goals like these is that they often aren’t the things you actually want. They’re just things you think you should want or have because other people do. And since there’s no deep, burning desire inside you to reach these goals…you never move forward.
When you set goals with me, though, I never let you fall into that trap. Instead, we focus on discovering your unique purpose on this Earth with questions like:
- What are your unique strengths? Your unique gifts and values?
- What makes you naturally want to wake up in the morning?
- What would you fight for, even if no one else supported you?
Using the answers to those kind of questions, we create goals and tools that are aligned with your life’s purpose. That way, you can feel strong and at home in your own skin as you pursue your goals, instead of vulnerable or uncomfortable or like you’re “faking it” the whole time.
And this approach is another thing that sets me apart from a looooottta the other people in the personal development space. I mean, you probably see a new example every day of someone promising to teach you “how to be an entrepreneur” or “how to eat paleo” or “how to find your soulmate.” But these strategies aren’t personalized to you – so they can’t leverage your strengths or tap into values.
But that’s just not how I do things. My work with you is, well, all about YOU and creating alignment in YOUR life, so the tools I teach and the goals we set will be tailor-made to fit your unique self!
7. I talk the talk and walk the walk when it comes to living out my dreams.
Now, I need to tell ya’ something before I get to this last point: all while writing this post, I’ve been blushing and biting my lip like crazy ‘cause it feels kinda arrogant to be tooting my own horn as a coach! But deep down I know: it is my duty as a human to honor my strengths and offer my unique gifts as service to the world.
Plus, deep down, I really believe that my life story is PROOF that it’s totally possible to achieve your dreams…to live happily, as your true self, kicking ass and looking forward to every single day of your life (no matter what cards you might have been dealt).
Now, it hasn’t been an easy road to get here – or, more specifically, to be living out my dream of being an entrepreneur who helps people transform their own lives every day!
Like I’ve shared many times before, I’ve been where you might be right now, whether it’s…
…looking at your friends and family relaxing and laughing and enjoying life and feeling like you’ll never get out of your own horrible funk.
…spending every moment of your free time at work dreaming of the job you’d rather be doing, but having noooo clue how to make that career change actually happen.
…looking in the mirror and hating what you see, at a size double 00, size 14 and everything in between.
…feeling trapped in a toxic relationship you KNOW is bad for you, yet you can’t find the strength to leave.
And not only have I overcome allll of these obstacles, but I’ve also learned how to be authentic and love my family even though they’re suuuuper different from me. I’ve built a business that is perfect for me and what I want in my life. I’ve created healthy habits and strong friendships and an awesome relationship with my amazing hubby.
But I couldn’t have accomplished any of that without the support and guidance of people who’d already checked all those epic items off their to-do list. And I can give that same innnnsanely transformative support and guidance to you.
How to Start Your Most Productive Year Evvvvverr…TODAY
If you’re ready to make 2019 the BEST year ever when it comes to chasing your dreams and finally achieving your goals, I have one piece of advice for ya’: don’t wait for January 1 to start.
After all, how would you rather wake up on New Years Day? Groggy and with a hangover? Or filled with excitement and motivation to slay the goals you laid out in December?
If you picked option number 2 (and I mean, who wouldn’t?!?), here’s the EXACT present you need to give yourself this December: a breakthrough session with me! In this 90-minute, one-on-one session with me, we’ll explore why you’re struggling, discover what goals you actually wanna set for 2019 and create a step-by-step action plan you can start ASAP. But here’s the key: if you wanna have an epically productive 2019, you need to book your breakthrough session NOW. That way, you can start January with one hell of a bang! To learn more about my breakthrough sessions or to book yours today, click here.
The Last Thing You Need to Know About Me, a Life Coach
It’s been ten years since I had my first coaching session with Natasha, and I still sometimes think of those afternoons spent talking in her office. After all, it’s through her that I first learned…
…how freakin’ powerful it can be to have a constant, unconditional cheerleader in your life.
…that not all goals are created equal, and that the best goals are the ones that really set YOUR unique soul on fire.
…and that I can do WAYYYY more than I think I can – especially with a badass mentor by my side.
The best part?
Those are just a few of the life-changing aha-moments I can pass along to you, too!
So if, right now, you’re feeling too anxious to take a plane or frustrated about epiccccally failing to eat more veggies like you promised this year or like you’ll never turn your dream job into a reality…know that 2019 can be different. You CAN decide right now to make a change. And equally important: know that you’re not alone. I’ve been exactly where you are. I’ve felt that frustration and worry and self-doubt and self-hatred.
But I climbed my way out of that hole…and I can give you all the tools and guidance and support you need to build your own escape ladder.
Now, all that’s left for you to do is ask.
What is one goal you absolutely want to knock out of the park in 2019? Tell me in the comments!