What if anxiety wasn’t an obstacle keeping you from finding true love, nabbing that epic promotion or living the life of your dreams?
What if, instead, anxiety was the KEY to healing your mental health – for good?
Now, I know this may sound a lil’ crazy. Hell, back when I was having daily anxiety attacks and overthinking evvvvery minute of my day, I would NEVER have said anxiety could be a “good” thing. To be honest…I kinda thought it was a curse.
But over the years, I’ve realized something pretty mind-blowing:
It’s taught me…
…how to practice self-compassion.
…how to eat in a way that makes me feel more energized than I EVER had before.
…how to deeply connect with and get the support I need from people around me.
…how to be mindful.
And. So. Much. MORE.
In fact, this roller-coaster of a healing journey from anxiety – and allll the beautiful benefits I discovered along the way – is why I created my course, Freedom From Anxiety. That way, everyone – including you 😉 – can cultivate better mental health from within…just like I did.
But here’s the thang. A life-changing course like Freedom From Anxiety didn’t just pop into my head on a quiet Tuesday night at work and appear on the Internet a few days later. It took a looooottta time and thinking to get FFA ready to change the world…and you!
So today, I thought I’d share a lil’ bit about HOW I actually created Freedom From Anxiety…and why healing yourself through your heart and your intuition is the absolute BEST way to finally rock better mental health.
The Single Question That Can Help You Slay Your Anxiety
Back when my mental health was at its absolute WORST and every holiday party or work presentation made my heart race and my palms super sweaty, I was desperate for someone to cure my anxiety.
So I visited every single kind of doctor I could find, from herbalist to traditional MD.
Until one day…it hit me.
What if, instead of asking a millllion different health experts for help and getting a milllion different solutions…I became the CEO of my own healing and decided what worked for me?
And, no, it wasn’t easy. After all, nobody ever teaches us how to be our own doctor! And I didn’t know how to “fix” my anxiety.
But here’s what I did know, even back then:
Whenever I felt a deep sense of peace, connection, and love in my heart…I never felt anxious.
Because love is the opposite of fear.
And if anxiety is fear, doing extra things that bring love and heart into your life IS the key to healing.
So I used peace and looooove as my measure of success for every single “cure” for anxiety I tried.
Every time I changed up my diet or tried a new meditation, I’d ask myself: “Does this solution hearten or harden me?”
AKA, does this make me feel love, connection and peace deep in my heart…or does it make me more stiff and tense and bad about myself?
And after I started asking that question and tapping deeeeep into my own intuition, tons of light bulbs went off inside my head:
- That popping a pill before a big office party numbed me up and kept me from feeling panicked…but definitely didn’t make me feel at peace.
- That telling myself, “You’re not anxious! Suck it up!” when my hands started to sweat and I could feel my heart racing would only make me feel like an epic failure.
- That all the times I avoided or pushed my anxiety waaaaay deep inside…I was hardening myself.
Sure, all those “coping mechanisms” felt good in the moment. But I realized that they made me hate my anxiety even more. Because they made me feel like I always had something to hide. That I was never good enough and always had to wear a mask. That I was broken – and could never be fixed.
The Secret to Finding Healthier Ways to Cope with Anxiety
So, I decided to STOP avoiding my anxiety…as freakin’ terrifying as that sounded.
When I was about to go over to a friend’s housewarming party and dying to take a pill…I’d ask myself, “Well, what’s something else I can do instead? Something that would bring me into my heart?”
And I came up with a list:
- Call a friend…
- Think about my sweet cat at home, waiting to cuddle with me…
- Practice self-compassion…
And every single point on that list was a muuuuuch better option than my go-to “coping.” Because they’re the kinda behavior that would help me connect to my real self and others in a waaaaay more real and genuine way.
Now, this doesn’t mean embracing your anxiety will make allll your worries and doubts disappear as quickly as 2019 Gucci shoes that are 75% off. 😉
But by filling your heart with love…you’re making sure there’s no room left for anxiety or fear!
How Trusting My Intuition Revealed the Perfect Anti-Anxiety Diet For Me
Trusting my gut and finding out what “heartens me” was juuuuust as important when I started investigating how my diet and food choices impacted my mental health.
Now, as soon I started researching how diet impacts mental health, I got ENDLESS advice about alllll the things I had to cut out right away.
Gluten. Dairy. Processed sugar. Red meat. Soy. Grains. Sugar of any kind. Nightshades. Coffee.
The list honestly ran on and on…until it basically listed everything I was eating every day!
But then I asked myself: “Is cutting out allll this stuff ASAP gonna hearten or harden me?”
And immediately, I knew. I’d feel sad about turning down my hubby’s famous Sunday pancakes, and guilty for ruining “our” tradition. I’d feel angry about “needing” to munch on carrot sticks while all my friends enjoyed martinis and finger sandwiches during Friday night drinks. And I’d feel soooo disappointed with myself anytime I’d “slip up” and eat dairy-full chocolate or fluffy white bread.
So I decided on a different approach: instead of cutting everything out all at once, I’d experiment with food until I found a diet that made me feel more in my heart. More calm, less anxious and less frantic.
So I took one food out of my diet at a time for around 15 days each. And at the end of those two weeks, I asked myself, “Do I feel heartened or hardened by eliminating this food?”
With coffee, the answer was definitely heartened. I felt sooo much more at peace and ease without coffee…so I don’t drink it anymore. With grains, it was a no, so I still love adding a big scoop of millet or quinoa to my dinner.
But by eliminating one food at a time, I could actually learn what foods worked for me instead of struggling to follow someone else’s advice – which might not work for me in the first place, anyway!
How to Have Better Mental Health By Applying This Question to Your WHOLE LIFE
I didn’t stop there, either. I started learning about mindfulness…and I let the question, “Will this hearten or harden me?” guide my practice.
‘Cause, sure, mindfulness as a whole DID bring me closer to my heart. But some mindfulness techniques centered me and grounded me while others felt forced or like I was being pushed into an emotional space I wasn’t ready to explore just yet.
That’s when I’d do something I’d NEVER have done years ago, when I was determined to do what everyone else said was the “right” thing to heal my mental health. I’d stop that uncomfortable exercise…and I’d find one that brought me into my joy and heart and love instead.
And then I repeated this same process with my relationships. My work routine. My hobbies. Until I surrounded myself with SO many things that heartened me, that filled me with love…there was very little space in my for fear or anxiety.
How YOU Can Start Improving Your Mental Health TODAY
One of the hardest parts of anxiety is feeling like you have no control. You never know when a panic attack will hit, or if you’ll be able to handle it or what the “best” thing is to do.
And it feels even more overwhelming to have to jump from doctor to therapist to psychologist just in the hope that somebody will be able to help you.
That’s why it feels SO amazing to put your own healing back into your OWN hands.
Can you even imagine it?
Can you imagine being able to trust yourself? To listen to your body and use the messages its sending you to create your own, perfect, healing protocol?
If your answer is a big YES…you’re already making a powerful start in the right direction.
Now, take the next step. Take a look at your life. Your activities. Your people. Your job.
And ask yourself: “Is this heartening or hardening me?”
Figure out what people and places and activities bring your heart to life…and use those as guides to map your way to better mental health.
And if you need a little more help honing into your inner wisdom and hearing what it has to say…check out my 16-week course, Freedom From Anxiety.
I created this course specifically based on my own healing journey and it has already helped hundreds of people build better mental health. In it, I share all the heartening techniques and tools you need to stop avoiding your anxiety, find the right diet and mindfulness practices for you, and overall build bulletproof mental health. Plus, I offer plenty of alternatives to each suggestion so that you can truly find practices that hearten you. So if you’re ready to stop living in fear and start embracing and healing through love…click here!
What People Don’t Realize About Their Struggles with Mental Health
Ten years ago, I thought my anxiety was a curse. I thought it was always gonna hold me back and that it was a “broken” part me.
Nowadays, my mindset is TOTALLY different…and so is my life!
Because here’s what anxiety really is: a guide to true FREEDOM.
Freedom from constantly worrying about what other people think of you or if you can handle whatever shit will hit the fan. From doubting that you’ll ever be “good enough” to achieve your dreams. Hell, even from the little voice in the back of your head that’s always whispering everything you’re doing “wrong.”
As crazy as it sounds…your anxiety is actually what you can use to break free from alllll the things that are actually holding you back!
And if you need help finding that true, capital-F Freedom…you know where to find me! 🙂